Humor Series

1.     You should be sure the person is Sardar when he: 

•         Puts lipstick on the forehead because he wants to make up his mind. 

•         Gets stabbed in a shoot-out. 

•         Sends a fax with a postage stamp on it. 

•         Tries to drown a fish in water.

•         Thinks socialism means partying. 

•         Trips over a cordless phone. 

•         Takes a ruler to bed to see how long he slept. 

•         At the bottom of the application where it says "sign here" he puts "Sagittarius." 

•         Studies for a blood test and fails. 

•         Sells the car for gas money.

•         Misses the 44 bus, and takes the 22 twice instead. 

•         Drives to the airport and sees a sign that said, "Airport left",  he turns around and goes home. 

•         Gets locked in furniture shop and sleeps on the floor. 

2.      Have you ever read Shakespeare?

Sardar: "No, who wrote it?"

3.     Sardar ordered a pizza and the clerk asked if he should cut it in six or twelve pieces.

"Six, please. I could never eat twelve pieces."

4.     Why did 18 sardarjis go to a movie?

Because below 18 was not allowed. 

5.     How do you measure a Sardar's intelligence?

Stick a tire pressure gauge in his ear 

6.     What do you do when a Sardar throws a pin at you? 

Run like Hell....he's got a hand grenade in his mouth. 

7.     How do you make a Sardar laugh on Saturday? 

Tell him a joke on Wednesday. 

8.     What is the Sardar doing when he holds his hands tightly over his ears?

Trying to hold on to a thought 

9.     Why do Sardars work seven days a week?

So you don't have to re-train them on Monday. 

10. Why can't Sardars make ice cubes?

They always forget the recipe. 

11. 11. How did the Sardar try to kill the bird? 

He threw it off a cliff. 

12. What do you see when you look into a Sardar's eyes?

The back of his head

13. What do you do when a Sardar throws a hand grenade at you? 

Pull the pin and throw it back. 

14. What do you call a sardar who drinks only beer? 

Just-beer Singh ('T' silent!) 

15. What do you call a sardar who has only one drink?

Just-one Singh.

16. Why does Sardar always smile during lightning storms? 

They think someone is taking their picture.

17. Why does Sardar have "TGIF" written on their shoes?

Toes Go In First. 

18. How can you tell when Sardar sends you a fax? 

It has a stamp on it.

19. Why can't Sardar dial 911?

They cannot find the eleven on the phone 

20. How do you get Sardar on the roof?

Tell him the drinks are on the house.

21.  "Oh, look at the dead bird." 

Sardar looked skyward and said "Where, Where? 

22. What do smart Sardar and UFOs have in common? 

You always hear about them but you never see them. 

23. Why does it take longer to build a Sardar snowman as opposed to a regular one?

You have to hollow out the head. TO LOOSE WEIGHT...The doctor told Sardarji that if he ran eight kilometers a day for 300 days, he would lose 34 kilos. At the end of 300 days, Sardarji called the doctor to report he had lost the weight, but he had a problem. "What's the problem?" asked the doctor. "I'm 2400 kms from home."